A Girl in a Boys' Football Team: A Guide for Coaches and Clubs

What the evidence says about girls and boys playing together

Before puberty, differences in athletic performance between boys and girls are minimal. The American College of Sports Medicine's 2023 expert consensus statement says exactly that, and adds that large differences emerge at puberty, from around age 12, mainly because of the effects of testosterone in boys. A 2018 review in *Endocrine Reviews* reached the same conclusion: no meaningful sex difference in athletic performance before puberty, and a clear one from puberty onwards.

Two cautions matter for coaches. First, these findings describe groups; in any squad of ten-year-olds, individual children differ a lot in speed, strength and skill, so an average says little about a particular player. Second, children mature at different times. On average girls start puberty a little earlier than boys, and late or early developers of either sex can look very different from teammates of the same age.

That is why football associations allow mixed teams in youth football and set age rules for them. In England, mixed teams are allowed up to and including U18; The FA raised the limit from U16 for the 2015/16 season. FA-funded research led by Dr Laura Hills at Brunel University London found that boys and girls who played together built friendships and mutual respect, and that girls in mixed teams had more chances to develop their skills and enjoy the game.

Why girls leave: the real reasons

When girls stop playing, physical differences are rarely the main reason. Research points to social and environmental factors. Women in Sport's 2022 report *Reframing Sport for Teenage Girls* found that 43% of girls who once saw themselves as sporty disengage after primary school, compared with 24% of boys. The reasons girls gave included fear of being judged, lack of confidence and not liking others watching them.

A 2023 qualitative study in *Qualitative Research in Sport, Exercise and Health* (deJonge, Vani, Zammit and Sabiston, University of Toronto) interviewed women who had played on boys' teams as adolescents. They described having to overcome assumptions that girls were inferior at sport, and some changed their appearance to fit in. The researchers recommended inclusive language from coaches, fewer gender-based and body-related comments, and more women in coaching roles.

Coaches and parents of girls in mixed teams often describe the same practical issues: feeling alone, no other girls or women around, comments from teammates or opponents, receiving the ball less, and awkwardness about changing. Each of these can be addressed by the coach and club.

A girl in a boys' football team: treat her as a player

The single most important principle: she is a member of the squad with the same rights and the same expectations as everyone else.

• Same criteria for minutes and positions. Use the same rotation rules as for everyone. Let her play in different positions, as you would with any player.
• Same demands. Ask the same of her in effort and attitude. Lowering expectations sends the message that she is not really part of the team.
• No special spotlight. Do not make her the centre of team talks, photos or praise because she is a girl.
• Language. Address the group as 'team', 'players' or by the team name, never 'lads' or 'boys'. It is a small change that every player notices.

Practice idea: everyone touches the ball

If you notice she receives the ball less in games, use a condition rather than an instruction. In a 5v5 on a 35 x 25 m pitch, a goal only counts if every outfield player on the team has touched the ball in that attack. Games of 6 minutes, three games. Coaching focus: the rule applies to all players, so it includes her without singling her out, and it helps any player who is often ignored.

Clear rules on comments and teasing

Comments such as 'you got beaten by a girl' hurt her and the boy it is aimed at. Set a team rule at the start of the season: no comments about anyone's gender, body or appearance, from teammates, opponents or adults. Deal with it calmly and every time.

1. In your own team: stop the comment, name it, and explain the rule. Talk privately afterwards to the player who made it.
2. From opponents: tell the referee and the opposing coach at the next break. Most coaches will deal with it.
3. From adults: report it to your Club Welfare Officer, and to the league or County FA if it happens at a match.

The boys in the team have a big role. When teammates treat her as one of the squad, comments from outside lose most of their effect. Praise that behaviour when you see it, as you would any act of fair play. See also fair play in youth football.

Changing rooms, privacy and tournaments

The FA's safeguarding guidance on changing rooms says that in mixed-gender activities, separate facilities must be available for boys and girls. It also says adults must not change at the same time as children, children using changing rooms should be supervised by two adults, and phones and cameras should not be used in changing areas.

• At home matches: agree a separate room or a time slot before the season. A referee's room or a spare office can work.
• At away matches: many young players arrive already changed. Make that the norm for the whole team, so she is not the only one.
• At tournaments: contact the organiser in advance about changing and toilets. Organisers should list separate facilities in the information pack.
• Team talks: hold them outside the changing room or after everyone has changed, so she is not left out.

Talk to her, link her up, avoid common mistakes

Have a short, relaxed conversation with her and her family at the start: is there anything that would make training or match days easier? Then let her be a player. Check in occasionally, as you would with any player, without making her the topic.

Help her meet other girls who play. Point the family to a girls-only session, such as the FA's Weetabix Wildcats for ages 5 to 11 or Squad Girls' Football for 12 to 14, or a local girls' team. Playing in a mixed team and also training with girls is a common and healthy combination. A trip to a women's match gives her role models.

Common mistakes to avoid

• Always putting her in defence or in goal.
• Going easy on her in practices, or telling boys to go easy on her.
• Treating her as a mascot or a novelty.
• Posting photos or stories about 'our girl' on social media or sharing them with local press without her and her family's agreement.
• Assuming she will want to move to a girls' team at a certain age. Ask her.

Frequently asked questions